Beneath the veneer

Time is of no consequence

When it comes to that imaginary age spot I see

Next to that wrinkle of a frown

On a forehead

Spending too much time in that perpectual freeze

I worry more about fitting into that size 4 jeans

Than to pick up that squeaky toy that's in the way of my new espadrilles 

I skip that meal 

Call myself a health nut

Just so I can stand next to the 20 something kid

And feel invincible

I can't find that happy place

That thought that gives me contentment

Why?

Because I need to know what everyone around me

In the world is doing

Just so I can claim to do the same

Keep up appearances

Put that lipstick on

And feel power for that moment

Friends come and go

I choose them as I would

A Chanel scarf

See the silky exterior

Put it against my skin so it complements

How I keep them close

Be the one to stoke their egos with flattery

While inside I'd rather be somewhere else.

I need to be

I have to be

The most prominent

Center of attention

If not the only voice in the room

Being followed and applauded

For if not the Belle of the Ball

My wrath will be invoked 

The green eyed cashmere serpent

Forking it's tongue

Spewing secret venom

On unsuspecting backs

I'll play the game

Of divide and conquer

To the best of my abilities 

For without that excitement

My life is dull 

Without spark

And even in the moments

Of truth

I shy away from being true

To myself

To the reality that looks back at me

From that gilded Mirror Mirror On the Wall

I have to be the fairest of them all

Or I strike , smite them down

Those who have it easy

The Witty, the Kind, the ones that effortlessly

Go through life

With no internal turmoil

Or the strife that brings me to my knees

But I stand tall

Keep that manicured hand in order

Smile my best

Find my way in the social sea

Just so no one can see

That Fatal Flaw

In me....